Quote of the day
How can I play baseball when I’m worried about foreign policy?
~Charles Schulz

How can I play baseball when I’m worried about foreign policy?
~Charles Schulz
Hear, hear!
Hot dogs, baseball, summer. What more could you need? pic.twitter.com/m0e3x4BdhZ
— Charlie Brown (@Peanuts_4Fans) July 26, 2023
I seem to be on a Major League kick lately, though this viewing was prompted by coming across Major League II available for free on YouTube. Released in 1994, this flick serves as sequel to the original Major League. Many of the original cast returned for this installment of the series, including Charlie Sheen, Tom Berenger, and Corbin Bernsen. However, Omar Epps replaced Wesley Snipes in playing Willie Mays Hayes, and a number of new cast members also appear in this film.
In this installment, the Indians have become complacent and arrogant after their success in the previous season/movie and they start losing games due to their poor performance and attitude. For example, Ricky “Wild Thing” Vaughn is so caught up in trying to impress the media and his new girlfriend that he has lost his fastball and his edge. Instead, he begins to rely on ineffective breaking balls, for which he has given nicknames such as “Eliminator” and “Humiliator.” Former voodoo practitioner Pedro Cerrano has converted to Buddhism, which has made him so peaceful and passive that he’s lost his power as a hitter. Willie Mays Hayes has become a movie star and has injured his knee, making him unable to run fast or hit well, and he therefore now fancies himself a power hitter.
Meanwhile, Roger Dorn, the former third baseman, has bought the team from Rachel Phelps, the former owner who wanted them to lose, but he doesn’t have the funds to pay the players or improve the facilities. Additionally, at the end of spring training, manager Lou Brown informs catcher Jake Taylor that he is keeping him on as a coach rather than a player. Jake is upset and rejects the offer at first, but then reluctantly accepts the position.
The team also faces challenges from the newer members of its roster. Jack Parkman is a selfish and arrogant catcher who joins the Indians, but later leaves for their rivals, the Chicago White Sox. Isuro “Kamikaze” Tanaka is a Japanese outfielder who clashes with Cerrano over their cultural differences. Rube Baker is a rookie catcher who has trouble throwing the ball back to the pitcher because he gets nervous.
Faced with no other options, Dorn sells the Indians back to Rachel Phelps. With the Indians positioned in last place, Phelps decides this is the perfect opportunity to revive her dream to try to move the team to Florida. The team continues on in a chaotic, disunified vein that culminates in an all-team on-field brawl that leads to their ejection.
In the end, the Indians manage to overcome their difficulties and take off on a hot streak that allows them to make it to the playoffs, where they face the White Sox in a decisive game. The players have regained their old spark and end the film with a World Series berth.
All in all, I can’t say I enjoyed this film as much as the original. It has its moments, for sure, but it is not the original Major League. It largely mirrors the plot of just about every other sports sequel — a team growing complacent and losing its spark. As someone who enjoys baseball movies in general, I can’t honestly discourage anyone from watching this movie, because a part of me did still enjoy it. Just don’t go in with any expectations that it will match its predecessor.
I’ve posted a few variations of the classic poem, “Casey At the Bat.” Each version of the poem follows the general cadence and length of Ernest Lawrence Thayer’s original. What’s unique and fun about this nonet by Michael Ceraolo is not only the brevity of it, but also the subtle, tongue-in-cheek humor embedded within.
*
It was now the bottom of the ninth
Two on, two out, two runs behind
Situational drama
Superstar at the plate
First pitch: strike one called
Strike two called, then
swing and miss
Casey
kays
Released in 1998, Major League: Back to the Minors is the third installment of the Major League series, and last night, I sat down to take in the show. I haven’t yet seen Major League II, so that’s on the list for future viewing, but Back to the Minors is a standalone installment, so it didn’t impact my understanding of things to skip to this one.
The movie stars Scott Bakula as Gus Cantrell, a veteran pitcher for a minor league team, the Fort Myers Miracle. After Gus gets ejected from a game for pulling the “frozen ball trick,” Roger Dorn, the owner of the Minnesota Twins, recruits Gus to be the manager of the Buzz, the Twins’ AAA minor league affiliate.
Much like the Cleveland Indians of Major League, the minor league Buzz is a team filled with dysfunctional players, including Lance “The Dance” Pere (a ballet dancer turned ballplayer), pitcher Hog Ellis, and pitcher Carlton “Doc” Windgate, a medical school graduate who throws a fastball so slow, it doesn’t even register on the radar gun. Even Pedro Cerrano, of Major League fame, now plays for the Buzz. The star of the team is home run hitter Billy “Downtown” Anderson, who suffers from supreme arrogance due to his success at the plate. Gus makes it his mission to help Downtown become a more well-rounded, and humbler, ballplayer.
Gus also has a rivalry with Leonard Huff, the arrogant manager of the Minnesota Twins. Huff challenges Gus to a game between the Buzz and the Twins, which ends in a tie after Huff turns off the stadium lights to prevent potential embarrassment. Huff then invites Downtown Anderson to play with the major league team, but Downtown fails against major league pitching and returns to the Buzz, admitting to Gus that he should’ve listened to him more.
Gus leads the Buzz to a division title and challenges Huff again, this time with his job on the line. The Buzz manage to defeat the Twins, and Gus is offered the opportunity to become manager of the Twins. Gus declines, however, opting to stay with the Buzz.
All in all, I enjoyed this flick. It’s not as good as the original Major League, but no sequel is ever as good as the original. It’s definitely not high art, but I didn’t expect it to be, and it makes for an amusing and relaxing evening.
On April 1, 1989, This Week In Baseball aired the segment below announcing that Major League Baseball has legalized aluminum bats for one season. I have to say, they did a convincing job of it, and I would be curious to find out how many fans fell for this fabricated story.
Football has hitting, clipping, spearing, piling on, personal fouls, late hitting, and unnecessary roughness. Baseball has the sacrifice.
~George Carlin
I hope that everyone is enjoying a warm and cozy holiday season. I wish you all the very best as we head into the final days of 2022 and look forward to an exciting new year!
I stumbled upon this video this morning, and I found myself caught between laughing out loud and shaking my head in astonishment. This video from FivePoints Vids features Little League ball fields, high school fields, minor league fields, and even a rec center field and a couple of softball fields. As you’ll discover, these ballparks are truly atrocious. The multipurpose fields are, in my opinion, the worst of the worst, but even some of the baseball-only fields are pretty horrendous. The narrator of the video makes some pretty hysterical comparisons as he describes each failure of a ball field, so if you can spare a few minutes, it’s worth the watch.
The great thing about baseball is when you’re done, you’ll only tell your grandchildren the good things. If they ask me about 1989, I’ll tell them I had amnesia.
~Sparky Anderson